Month: April 2023

Costa Rica

by Rhobie Toussaint, posted in Experience, Photo Essays

In January 2023, I had the wonderful opportunity of studying abroad in San Jose, Costa Rica. This experience was made possible by the Benjamin A. Gilman International Scholarship, which funded my trip.

During my time abroad, I took a course titled “Costa Rican Healthcare System and Tropical Medicine.” Through this course, I learned about the history of Costa Rica and its Healthcare system and how Costa Rica’s healthcare systems differs from that of the United States. I also learned about some diseases/viruses found in Costa Rica, such as dengue fever and Covid-19, as well as what the preventive measures for these diseases looked like during the height of outbreaks. Through lectures, a museum visit, a case study, building a timeline, and participating in group presentations, my classmates and I were able to learn more about the different aspects that make up medicine and healthcare within the country. I found the class to be very eye-opening and educational. I realized that how a country views healthcare (as a privilege or as a right) has a significant impact on what that country’s healthcare system looks like.

My time in Costa Rica was not only spent sitting in a classroom though. AIFS, the provider of this wonderful study abroad program, planned different trips and excursions for us to attend. After orientation, we saw different landmarks in downtown San Jose. Later that week, we spent a weekend at Manuel Antonio National Park. There, I saw beautiful beaches, went on a hike, and got to spend time in nature. Other visits included: Irazu Volcano National Park, Museum of Calderón Guardia, and an indigenous reserve. Each and every one of these visits taught me something new about the Costa Rica, the culture there, and its rich history.

Even though I have been back in the United States for a couple months now, I think about Costa Rica every day. I enjoyed viewing breathtaking sights. I am filled with nostalgia whenever I think about walking back from the beach (located at Manuel Antonio park) with other students. We had to walk while it was raining but in that moment, I wasn’t annoyed that I was getting rained on. I simply thought “pure vida” and enjoyed the peaceful walk back to my hotel room. I laugh whenever I think about the monkeys who are adamant about stealing people’s food at the Manuel Antonio and near the hotel. I smile when I think about the wonderful people I met during my time abroad, and then I hope they are doing well. I feel a sense of serenity when I think about how in Costa Rica, I was able to immerse myself in another culture while having the luxury of moving at a slower pace. I did not have to worry about twenty different responsibilities, and I was able to be present. Most of all, I feel grateful when I remember that only a small percentage of students get to study abroad, and I had the chance to be part of that number.

I will never forget this once in a lifetime opportunity. Below is a set of pictures that do a decent job at capturing my experience:

On January 7th, 2023, I headed to the airport early in the morning and took a flight to Costa Rica.
Lunch after orientation the following day.
From our tour of downtown San Jose.
Every day started with a traditional Costa Rican meal made by my host family.
I walked to the University Monday-Friday’s for class. This photo represents my view as I’m walking
During my time abroad, I studied at Veritas University.
First trip: Irazú Volcano National Park. However, it was so cloudy that we weren’t able to see much.
…But we made the best of it anyway.
Following our trip to the Volcano, we visited the Sanatorium Duran Ruins and the Basilica Church.
We visited the Museum of Calderón Grardia. Dr. Gaurdia was a former president of Costa Rica who contributed to many social and health reforms within the country.
Views from the excursion to Manuel Antonio National Park and Beach.
During one of our breaks from the hike, we were able to see this view of the ocean. This picture doesn’t do it justice – it was absolutely breathtaking.
In the mornings at the hotel near Manuel Antonio, we took this path to go get breakfast and see one of the beaches.
Following one of our classes, we visited the Huerter Indigenous reservation. There we learned the history and customs of the Huetares.
During our last day in Costa Rica, we went back downtown, had lunch, and visited a national museum before stopping to purchases souvenirs.
Something sweet to close out my time in Costa Rica.
They say all things must come to end, but this experience will always stay with me.

Capstone Part 2: Ode to Haitian Resilience

by Rhobie Toussaint, posted in Writing the Exile Experience

The Concept:

For this song, I wanted to both recognize and celebrate the resilience of Haitian people. I would say that they, in a way, have also experienced exile. Many Haitians know what it is it like to struggle, start over, and adjust to very difficult circumstances. I know that this is the case for my own parents and other Haitian immigrants. And it likely was the case for the Haitians who fought for their independence during the Haitian Revolution. I wanted this song to capture this hardship while simultaneously recognizing how far we have come. Because honestly, the resilience of Haitian people is really something worth celebrating.

The Process:

I thought of the Haitian Creole lyrics about a month ago, on a Saturday while getting ready to leave for the weekend. Right before my drive, I hit the record button to record a voice note of my idea so I would not forget a thing. This song probably took me less than an hour to write (including the translating part). The part of the process that took the longest was recording. After about two weeks of going back and forth, the musicians from my church and I were finally able to find a time to meet and record the song. Since it was decided early on that this song would include Konpa music as a way to represent Haitian Culture through music, it was important that all four musicians (or at least three out of four them) were present. We met on a Friday night before church service to figure out the music and record. To be honest, I found myself getting frustrated during practice. I felt like the way I sung the outro was not strong enough, and slowing down the song at the end just was not working. However, after a few practice runs following the end of the church service, everything starting coming together. The outro became the intro. We changed the key starting key and chord progressions. The musicians figured out how to start after my intro. Finally, at about 11:45 at night, after a many takes, multiple sayings of “no no no” “let’s start over” and “my bad,” we had a finished product. And boy, did it feel good to hit “stop recording” on the mixer.

The Product:

Below is the recording and lyrics for this song, titled “Ode to Haitian Resilience.” I’m sure I can go on about some of the flaws present in the recording, but that’s not important. This was never meant to be a perfect product, but rather a way for me to pay homage to the strength of the Haitian people and the way they have been able to navigate their version of the exile experience. This song means a lot to me, and I hope you are able to get something from it as well ❤

P.S. the singing starts at about 6 or 7 seconds (I wasn’t able to crop the audio).

Ode to Haitian Resilience by Rhobie T.

Piano: Job M. | Drums: Daniel R.

Bass: Elijah P. | Guitar: Jeffrey L. 

When they say we’re worth nothing 
We’re not worth saving 
When the world turns their back against us and they say there's nothing to us 
Don't you worry my dear, 
We’ll still be standing here 

Haitians were in slavery 
Oh but they’re still here 
They fought in a big battle 
Oh but they’re still here 
They had to start to start over 
Oh but they’re still here 
Oh but they’re  still here 
Oh but they’re still here 

My People are resilient 
Oh, yes they’re still here 
They endured much misery
Oh, yes they’re still here 
They endured much sadness
Oh, yes they’re still here
Oh, yes they’re still here
Oh, yes they’re still here

Oh yes, Oh yes 
We are still here
Oh yes, Oh yes 
We are still here

Lè yo di nou pa anyen
Nou pa vo sove 
Lè mond la vire do yo sou nou  
E yo di pa gen anyen pou nou 
Ou pa bezwen enkyete
N’ap toujou kanpe la  

Ayisyen te nan esklavaj 
O men yo la toujou
Yo batay nan gwo goumen 
O men yo la toujou 
yo te kòmanse ankò 
O men yo la toujou 
O men yo la toujou 
O men yo la toujou 

Pèp mwen an rezistan
O wi yo la toujou
Yo pase anpil mizè 
O wi yo lo la toujou 
yo te pase anpil tristès
O wi yo la toujou
O wi yo la toujou 
O wi yo la toujou

O wi, O wi 
Nou toujou la
O wi, O wi 
Nou toujou la

Capstone Part 1: Story of Exile

by Rhobie Toussaint, posted in Writing the Exile Experience

The Concept:

Throughout this course, I have learned a lot about the exile experience and how it is indeed a nuanced and taxing experience that varies for each individual. So for my final project, I wanted to create something that would be meaningful to me and would show the nuance of exile. I also saw this project as an opportunity to explore my Haitian language and culture and how they relate to exile. This song in particular was primarily written to express what I imagine exile can be like, as it is an experience that is different for all who go through it. However, I wanted to add a personal touch to it, which led to the second verse briefly exploring how exile relates to me as a daughter of an immigrant and as someone of Haitian descent. Essentially, this song is the product of reflecting the difficult, painful experience that is called exile. 

The Process:

It took me about 30-45 minutes to write this song, and the melody came to me almost immediately. I remember quickly recording a voice note right before my vocal lesson so I wouldn’t forget how I wanted the song to go. Originally, I wrote the first verse in English and the second verse in Haitian Creole, so I thought that it would be fitting if this song was translated in both languages. Recording the song, however, took a bit longer. On the first day of working on the song with the musicians from my church, we took some time to figure out what music accompaniment would be like. It took several practice runs to figure this out. We recorded our practice runs that Saturday night for reference. About two weeks later, we met up again at the church to practice some more. Since we did not have the drummer present, the pianist used his keyboard to find a beat that could work throughout the song. After a couple hours (about three), we were finally in a good place to record the final version of the song.

Up until last night, this song did not have a title. I was talking to one of the musicians about my dilemma regarding naming the song. As we went over the lyrics together, he said something along the lines of, “you know, the song sound like a story. Maybe you can name it something like ‘the story of ..” This inspired me to title this song, “The Story of Exile.” Everything about this title feels right.

The Product:

Below you will find the lyrics to and the recording of “The Story of Exile.” Now, I am definitely not a professional singer, and the quality of the audio is the best we could do with the equipment at hand. However, what was most important to me was that the product feels authentic. And it does. I hope that you are able to get something from my reflection through the form of a song, imperfections and all ❤

The Story of Exile by Rhobie Toussaint

Piano: Job M.

Bass: Jeffrey L. 

Chorus: 
Oh, oh-oh 
To leave all that you’ve known 
Oh, oh-oh 
Nowhere to call home 
Fighting a fight 
That’s debilitating 
Wondering why 
Everything can’t change 
Oh, oh oh 
It’s sad, but it’s true 
Not everyone can speak their truth 

Verse 1: 
Without
Having to start over 
Running away 
Wondering if they will see another day 
Without 
Sleeping with one eye open 
All these mixed emotions 
Wondering if there’s a better life life there 
for them 

Chorus: 
Oh, oh-oh 
To leave all that you’ve known 
Oh, oh-oh 
Nowhere to call home 
Fighting a fight 
That’s debilitating 
Wondering why 
Everything can’t change 
Oh, oh oh 
It’s sad, but it’s true 
Not everyone can speak their truth 

Verse 2: 
One day my dad told me his road was not easy
And for all he’s done, I should say thank you 
Oh, Oh oh 
I know my people have much strength
My people from Haiti
They did so many things
To have a good life


Chorus: 
Oh, oh-oh 
To leave all that you’ve known 
Oh, oh-oh 
Nowhere to call home 
Fighting a fight 
That’s debilitating 
Wondering why 
Everything can’t change 
Oh, oh oh 
It’s sad, but it’s true 
Not everyone can speak their truth 


Koral: 
O, o-o
Pou kite tout sa ou konnen 
O, o-o
Okenn kote pou rete 
Wa’p goumen 
Li tres difisil 
Ou vle
 tout bagay chanjé 
O, o-o 
Li tris, men se verite
Se pa tout moun ki ka di verite 

Vèsè 1
San yo pa 
Bezwen kòmanse ankò 
Kouri Ale
Yo ap panse si yo ap wè yon lot jou ankò
San yo pa 
Domni avek yon je ouvri 
Yo ap santi anpil bagay
Panse si gen yon bi bon lavi 
Pou  yo 

Koral: 
O, o-o
Pou kite tout sa ou konnen 
O, o-o
Okenn kote pou rete 
Wa’p goumen 
Li tres difisil 
Ou vle tout bagay chanjé 
O, o-o 
Li tris, men se verite
Se pa tout moun ki ka di verite 


Vèsè 2
Yon jou Papa’m te di mwen ke wout li pa’t fasil 
E Pou tout sa li te pase, mwen bezwen di’l mesi 
O, o-o 
Mwen konnen pep mwen gen anpil fos, 
Moun mwen sot Ayiti 
Yon fe anpil bagay
Pou gen yon bon lavi 


Koral: 
O, o-o
Pou kite tout sa ou konnen 
O, o-o
Okenn kote pou rete 
Wa’p goumen 
Li tres difisil 
Ou vle
tout bagay chanjé 
O, o-o 
Li tris, men se verite
Se pa tout moun ki ka di verite

Exile Narrative

by Rhobie Toussaint, posted in Writing the Exile Experience

Exile: A Nuanced, Life-Changing Experience | Reflection Piece by Rhobie Toussaint

For most of my life, I did not think too much about exile. I didn’t take the time to consider what it meant, what that experience was like for people, and all the implications that come with the exile experience. Exile was nothing more than a word I heard here and there, from political candidates, from people I met, and from authors. And perhaps I should have given it a second or third thought, rather than letting the concept go over my head. And I’m sure it would have been useful to use any of those opportunities to figure what living in exile really means. But alas, I didn’t do any of that: until this class. 

Over the past few weeks, I have taken the time to really reflect on what exile is. I have crafted a definition of what I believe is the exile experience. Without knowing much, I believed that the exile experience is one that can be extremely brutal, emotionally taxing, and physically draining. When I thought of exile, I thought of the experience of leaving everything and everyone one has ever known or loved. Through the readings and discussions with my classmates, however, I learned that while my definition of exile was good, there were things about the exile experience that I hadn’t even begun to fathom.

Before reading Czeslaw Milosz’ “Notes on Exile,” I did not think about the assimilation process, and the feeling of being an outsider. His notes also revealed some more factors that made living in exile a mentally taxing experience. Additionally, that same text introduced the idea of how sensitive someone in exile would be when hearing information about their home place/country in the place that they immigrated to. 

 “Literature of nostalgia is only one among many
 modes of coping with estrangement from one’s native land.”

pg. 16-17

After reading this,I considered the fact that there are many mediums that have been used by people to cope with their experience of living in exile. Literature is just one of them.  People may share parts of their experiences through song, art, and oral stories. This makes sense as there are many ways to express oneself. 

Then, as I read the chapters by Edwidge Danticat and Ana Menendez, I started to look at exile through a Caribbean Lens. The stories told in these chapters  resonated with me as I am Haitian. “I Speak Out,” a chapter in Danticat’s book, tells the story of Alèrte Bélance, a Haitian woman who was nearly killed by the 1991 military coup d’état.  Alèrte was left with many bruises, broken bones, severed limbs and trauma. She, along with her family had to flee from Haiti and move to New Jersey for their own safety.  Although she suffered a lot, Alèrte continues to advocate for Haiti and the Haitian people. The following quote by  Alèrte stood out to me: 

“It healed, ’she said, ‘so I can tell my story, so people can know what happened to me.”

pg. 81

In the quote above, “It” referred to  Alèrte’s tongue that had “been cut in half [by the military members who almost killed her] and sewn back together again.” The quote is especially powerful because it shows  Alèrte’s strength, and how she chose to speak out about her experience.  Once again, I was reminded of the nuance that comes with every individual’s exile experience. 

In Menendez’ chapter, titled “Traveling with My Selves,” Menendez explores her experience of grappling with her different identities as she traveled around. For example, throughout her life, Menendez embraced her Cubanidad. However, when she finally visited Cuba at 27 and looked around, she no longer felt like she could identify as Cuba. Menendez describes the experience as follows: 

“Now, Cuba, that country that had previously only existed in my imagination awoke, like a living thing, to rebuke my shallow identity. Suddenly, I had no idea who I was. But I knew I wasn’t Cuban.”

pg. 201

Reading Menendez’ piece made me think about how grappling with multiple (or new) identities can be part of  the exile experience. When someone finds themselves in a new place, it can feel like some things that they resonated with before may no longer apply. I can imagine grappling with different identities can cause a lot of  dissonance. 

Both Danticat and Menendez were able to use the art of storytelling to captivate their audience and share what exile meant to them or people around them. They exemplify what great writing is: finding a way to get your point across while keeping your audience engaged. They masterfully used dialogue, personal narratives, and the experience of others to create an understandable and beautiful piece. They also caused me to reflect more, which leads me to believe that getting your audience to think/consider the ideas you are presenting is also an important tool for a writer. 

Reading pieces written about women who are either from or linked to the Caribbean made me think about if the experience of exile is closer to me than I thought. I considered my own parents, who are immigrants. I thought about the parents of many of my friends who are also immigrants. They weren’t exactly “banned” from Haiti, but it is clear that they needed to leave. Couldn’t that be another form of exile—Feeling forced to leave your home country, your family, and everything you know in hopes that there is a better life for you out there? Feeling like the political state and lack of resources in your home country was so unbearable that you could not fathom the thought of starting your family there? Couldn’t that be an exile experience in and of itself? I personally think yes, it can be. 

That being said, I know that I will never be able to fully understand what it is like to live in exile. However, I am realizing the immense value that comes from taking the time to understand exile as much as possible and broadening my perspective.

Exile is hard. Exile is life changing. Exile is forging new identities. Exile is trying to acclimate. Exile is an experience with ebbs and flows. But it’s also an experience that varies by person, and it’s an experience that can be described in many different ways. 

The exile experience is nuanced,  but it is an experience worth learning about.